"It`s actually a logical extension of our planned growth", said
Microsoft chairman Bill Gates, "It really is going to be a positive
arrangement for everyone. "
Microsoft representatives held a briefing in the oval office of the
White House with Us President Bill Clinton, and assured members of
the press that changes will be "minimal. " The United States will be
managed as a wholly owned division of Microsoft. An initial public
offering is planned for July of next year, and the federal government
is expected to be profitable by "Q41999 at latest, " according to
Microsoft president Steve Ballmer.
In a related announcement, Bill Clinton stated that he had
"willingly and enthusiastically" accepted a position as a vice
president with Microsoft, and will continue to manage the United
States government, reporting directly to Bill Gates. When asked how
it felt to give up the mantle of executive authority to Gates,
Clinton smiled and referred to it as "a relief. " He went on to say
that Gates has a "proven track record, " and that Us citizens should
offer Gates their "full support and confidence. "
Clinton will reportedly be earning several times the $200, 000
annually he has earned as Us president, in his new role at Microsoft.
Gates dismissed a suggestion that the Us Capitol be moved to Redmond
as "silly", though did say that he would make executive decisions for
the Us government from his existing office at Microsoft headquarters.
Gates went on to say that the House and Senate would "of course" be
abolished. Microsoft isn`t a democracy, " he observed, "and look how
well we`re doing. "
When asked if the rumored attendant acquisition of Canada was
proceeding, Gates said, "We don`t deny that discussions are taking
place. "
Microsoft representatives closed the conference by stating that
United States citizens will be able to expect lower taxes, increases
in government services and discounts on all Microsoft products.
About Microsoft: Founded in 1975, Microsoft (Nasdaq "Msft") is the
worldwide leader in software for personal computers, and democratic
government. The company offers a wide range of products and services
for public, business and personal use, each designed with the mission
of making it easier and more enjoyable for people to take advantage
of the full power of personal computing and free society every day.
About the United States: Founded in 1789, the United States of
America is the most successful nation in the history of the world,
and has been a beacon of democracy and opportunity for over 200
years. Headquedly be earning several times the $200, 000
annually he has earned as Us president, in his new role at Microsoft.
Gates dismissed a suggestion that the Us Capitol be moved to Redmond
as "silly", though did say that he would make executive decisions for
the Us government from his existing office at Microsoft headquarters.
Gates went on to say that the House and Senate would "of course" be
abolished. Microsoft isn`t a democracy, " he observed, "and look how
well we`re doing. "
When asked if the rumored attendant acquisition of Canada was
proceeding, Gates said, "We don`t deny that discussions are taking
place. "
Microsoft representatives closed the conference by stating that
United States citizens will be able to expect lower taxes, increases
in government services and discounts on all Microsoft products.
About Microsoft: Founded in 1975, Microsoft (Nasdaq "Msft") is the
worldwide leader in software for personal computers, and democratic
government. The company offers a wide range of products and services
for public, business and personal use, each designed with the mission
of making it easier and more enjoyable for people to take advantage
of the full power of personal computing and free society every day.
About the United States: Founded in 1789, the United States of
America is the most successful nation in the history of the world,
and has been a beacon of democracy and opportunity for over 200
years. Headquartered in Washington, Dc, the United States is a wholly
owned subsidiary of Microsoft Corporation.
"The United States of America" and "Microsoft" are registered
trademarks of Microsoft Corporation.
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